Like this:

I’ve never called myself a “feminist.” I’m not some weird
misogynistic crazy woman, but I like to consider myself a bit more
balanced than that–people are people and the random assignment of
sex should have nothing to do with anything besides what we have
under our clothes. The concept of “women should be quiet, stay at
home and make babies, and look pretty” is equally as stupid as the
concept that “men shouldn’t cry, should make tons of money, and
should act tough at all costs.” Antiquated lies, all of them. How
ridiculous can we, as humans, be? It should come as no surprise,
then, that when I see blogs and articles about so-called “feminist
issues,” I cringe a bit. I always feel like there is another side
to these issues that goes ignored in some strange double standard.
Women should be pretty/thin/blah blah blah…but we can’t ignore
the fact that men have a “box” they are supposed to fit into, as
well. (it’s just that they aren’t supposed to share their feelings
about it, remember?) Today, however, I ran across an article title
that made me think. And then made me angry. And then made me
resolve to just speak out when I feel like it. I didn’t even read
the article–just the title. That’s all it took. The topic? The old
belief that women should be quiet. (And in my head, the belief that
men should always speak up and fix everything). Think about it. How
many times have you edited yourself when you were not sure why? I
like to think I specialize in the written word, at least more so
than most if the population. Speaking? Sometimes, not so much. Time
and time again, I fall into the “I should just be quiet” trap and
edit myself. In fact, I edit myself right into a blathering,
mumbling, soft-spoken and simpering waif…who goes on and on and
on…and still doesn’t make her point. And you know what? That is
going to stop. Why does the belief that I should be “quiet” turn
me, an articulate, educated, and generally outspoken person, into a
hyper-manic meaningless word machine? How hard is it to say “I
don’t like that” or “I would rather stay home” or “you are my best
friend” or “I disagree”? This isn’t a women-only issue…it’s a
people issue. It’s time to make it a point to save those extra
words for describing a mountain or writing a song…and just say
what we mean. In fact, I’m going to practice right now: I’m tired
of hearing people (including myself) complain about the fears that
hold them back. And as long as I’m alive, I’m sure I will at times
be guilty of doing just that…but fighting those fears the whole
time. Maybe if we all make an effort to try that, life would be
that much less chaotic.

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